rowangolightly: (Yule)
The days come in a variety of good, not so good, cheerful, chipper and downright gloomy; today is "eh", somewhere in the middle of all those. Let me 'splain, if I can.

And let me begin by wishing us all WELL!

Today is Yule and while it's not the beginning of the year, I can see it from here. Perhaps I'm weird but I've never been able to look at the Sabbats like everyone else does. A lot of things are ending but more are beginning. I'm trying to look at it as more of the beginning than an ending or maybe the end of the ending and beginning of the beginning of a new life. That made sense in my head.

this will get rambly, please bear with me )

Happy, blessed Yule to you all.

And yes, I made this post public on purpose; it's time the cards were all laid on the table. I'm screening comments so everyone can be as candid as they like. If you wish for me to NOT unscreen what you've said, please make that clear.
rowangolightly: (Brusi Mid-ceremony)
Ya know, it's a real shame when we're both too tired and too busy to properly celebrate but...

Today marks the first anniversary of [livejournal.com profile] thebruce's and my wedding.

It's been an "interesting" year in many ways, my love, but I don't regret a thing and I love you more than ever. We've come a long way, haven't we? Here's to many more years of living, learning and loving together!

PS: This doesn't get you off the hook for a proper anniversary celebration, ya know! But I'm patient...

[[[UPDATE: I just answered the doorbell to find a nice lady holding a BEAUTIFUL bouquet of flowers! Picture when I find the camera...

Yep, he's a good boy and I think I'll keep him!]]]
rowangolightly: ("God Save the Queen")
First it's da Kidling's birthday. Happy Birthday, Amber!

Second, I really don't care for April 1st as in April Foole's Day. No, I don't. This doesn't mean that I don't have a good sense of humor. It simply means that this is a form of puerile humor that leaves me cold.

I used to be married to a clown. You have NO IDEA how many stupid, moronic, sophomoric jokes I was the butt of during the 14 years of the relationship. Salt in the sugar, vaseline on the toilet seat, rubber band over the handle of the kitchen sink sprayer so when I turned on the faucet I got sprayed, egg in the bottom of a shoe (oh YES, that one went over really well...he had it dumped onto his desk!) and many, many others.

He never, even at the age of 40, stopped doing the 'opening the door against his foot but acting like it hit him in the nose' trick. ha. ha. ha. /sarcasm. So that once when he really did hit himself in the face with the door, I burst out laughing so hard I damnear peed my pants. Really.

We are NOT amused. Don't....just, please don't. This is simply fair warning.

Oops...

Mar. 24th, 2008 07:04 pm
rowangolightly: (Coming Out)
Missed the anniversary!

March 22, '04 was when I completed moving out of KC and moved in with Bruce.

Wow...four years. What a lot has happened since then. And yes, what a difference 4 years makes.

So many friends I've made since then, can't imagine being without now. And yet, retained so many dear friends from up there, too.

Sometimes I feel like a whole different person. I'm so much more ME than I was, like I've finally grown up into myself in many ways.

I'm so grateful...

Seems like all I've done was grouse lately but I really am happier than I've ever been in my whole life.
rowangolightly: (Rowan Brooch)
I've been told this isn't timely nor advised but when has this ever stopped me before?

This is a Public Service Announcement for Men. This is not sponsored by anyone and not specifically pointed at anyone (yes, my hubby knows all about this, he's the one with the opinion in the first line, you see.) This is a hint for gift-buying for the women in your life, most particularly your sweetheart, your girlfriend, your wife, your lover...anyone with whom you have a significant relationship apart from the one who bore you or any you may have sired.

Disclaimer: This is meant not to chide nor to nag but rather to attempt to enlighten, with humor and tongue-in-cheek, those of the male gender of our species who wish to know a deep dark secret about women, the ones who are supposedly from Venus.

But first, some humor that seems appropos via an email that my hubby sent me last week from work.

Dear Diary )

Gentlemen,
After duly bearing in mind the rules by which my darling hubby trained up his four red-headed daughters when they were teenagers, which are of course,
1) Men are Stupid.
2) Men are Pigs.
3) Men never, ever take hints. Frequent application of the clue-by-four is required. (I added the last part with Bruce's approval.)
...I have decided to take it upon myself to proclaim a truism about gifting a woman which will save you lots of grief.

This pertains to woman in your life who are sweethearts, girlfriends, lovers, wives, primaries, secondaries, pen-pals and phone sex buddies. This does not necessarily apply to women who bore you or whom you may have sired; those rules are entirely different.

Are you paying attention?
::takes the tv remote and turns the tv off::
::puts the computer game on 'pause'::
Ok, NOW are you paying attention?
Thank you.

When it comes to a gift-giving situation, it is in your best interest to put some time and thought into your choice of gifts for her. No matter if she's said, "oh, you don't have to buy me anything!" SHE DOESN't MEAN IT. What she really means is, "don't spend a lot of money but get me SOMETHING that means you were thinking of me." Now if you've got a high maintenance gal, it means she really does want you to spend a lot of money, no matter if you shouldn't. That's another challenge altogether; if you cater to that, you're only getting what you deserve; the bills and the expectations.

If she's told you, "I want this CD, this book, this practical-household-item;" she will be pleased with it. But a corner of her brain will wail, "but why couldn't he have gotten me something sentimental; something he picked out just for me, that shows me how he really cares?"

Public Service Announcement to Women:
STOP saying that to him if it's not what you're really thinking. If you're really thinking, "Yes, but if he really loves me, he'll get me something little and elegant that says he was thinking just of me!" Then SAY that, don't make him guess. It's another form of deeply-rooted passive aggressiveness that our culture and television sit-coms and the advertisers have promoted.

...back to the Public Service Announcement to Men:

Guys, if you want the lady in your life to think you can walk on water and are a golden god, keep an ear out whenever you hear, "Oh, that's neat, I'd LOVE to have that!" or "Oh, isn't that lovely," take note! Make a list if you have to! Take note of her favorite color, her favorite gemstone, her favorite animal, what she lingers by and looks longingly at in a store but won't buy for herself. Note: it really does not have to be expensive but it has to be something that truly reflects how you feel about her; it has to show some thought and initiative for someone other than the most important person in your life; you. Did that make you wince? Sorry. Yes, you love her; SHOW her!

Fellas, if you want your lady to be blissfully happy, do what my father did. Occasionally, for no reason at all, he'd bring home a single rose for my mother. My father was a very smart man and built up a huge store of goodwill by doing this simple thing for my mother. Bear in mind, it doesn't have to be a rose, particularly if she's allergic. It could be a bunch of daisies or a bunch of violets, hell, it could be one of those bouquets that every grocery store in civilization has by their check out counters and takes you 5 minutes to stop and get; you probably need eggs or milk anyway and that might surprise her even more that you thought of it. (Bruce calls me sometimes on his way home and says, "honey, do we need anything at the store?" GODS, how sweet is that? Whether we do or not, he was THINKING about it!) It could be a bunch of wild-flowers that you passed by or it could be taking the clippers (when it's not cold and everything's dead outside, of course) to your own yard to bring her a handful of marigolds or a bunch of lilacs. The important thing is the thought and the follow-through, that you were thinking of her and had the initiative to do something about it.

What do you get out of it? *grin* I'll leave it up to her to decide. But trust me, a woman who knows she is loved by small, tender things you do, is a woman who is very happy in her relationship.

Gals, the same thing goes for you. When was the last time you sent a "Love You" card to your fella or sent him a rose, huh?



ED: And of course, my dear friend, Bob, said it far better than I could:
http://apocalypticbob.livejournal.com/262572.html

BTW, as I said to her, she's linked to mine and I've linked to hers...wasn't there something about that in that last questionnaire we both filled out? *wink*
rowangolightly: (Default)
Relationships=Communication

Since I post this web-site all over the place SO often that folk seem to think I'm proselytizing (which I AM NOT doing! Folk are either poly by nature or they aren't; lots of folk pretend to be poly and aren't, I really don't care one way or the other.) I thought I'd just copy and paste this wonderful thing on communication, since it seems to be up for a lot of folk lately.

NOTE: Please if you're about to roll your eyes and say, "There goes Rowan again..." STOP. Read this. It probably means you have some issues with communicating and especially need to read this. I don't care if your relationship is with your dog, your cat, your left hand, your parents, your kids, your lover, your co-workers. Get it? If not now, come back and read it later; have your roommate or sweetie or SO or whomever read it, too. This is about you learning how to be the best YOU that you can be for yourown self. Damnright, I'll proselytize about that.

Sure,it's posted on a Polyamory web-site but good writing about communication is just that; doesn't matter one damned bit who wrote it or what site it's on. And yes, I want to meet this person.

Ok, enough preaching, I have errands to run, a kilt to make.

the best damned piece on relationship communication I've ever seen )

Yeah, I'd love to meet this guy, shake his hand and thank him for all the times he's helped me get my head back on straight. Um, not that I'm trying to imply that I'm straight or anything, right?
rowangolightly: (Brusi Sad Song)
Since it's a much better idea than thinking of things that make me tense...you know, energy begets energy, right? So I'm going to list things that are making me smile, in no particular order.

1) Having a wonderful, pretty well-organized and peaceful workspace in which to create beautiful things
2) Classical music to work by
3) Loving he most amazing, sexy, thoughtful, brilliant and patient man whom at the moment, I think is downstairs taking a nap whom I am going to be married to in 8 days.
4) Hsving the skill to dye fabric gorgeous colors with amazing results; having the skill to dye piping to match the tiny satiny-thread leaves in the brocade I dyed navy blue. It's sorta a pale beigy-ecru-y color and I hit it dead on; mixed tan with a bit of dark green and some of the navy dye. This pleases me greatly; it's exactly the color I wanted it to be.
5) Having wonderful friends, a couple of whom are coming over to help me tomorrow; we'll get a lot done and have a good time all the while. Bruce is cooking!

I haven't said this lately and it bears repeating....

I LOVE my life! Yes, it gets busy and stressful and all that...but I DO love my life! I have exciting work to look forward to and friends at faire I'm looking forward to seeing and LOTS of friends who're coming to the wedding that I'm looking forward to seeing!

Now, back to work! Will reprint the to-do list soon.
rowangolightly: (Coming Out)
Momentous day...not only is it officially Spring but it's also an anniversary.

My sweetheart actually was the one who remembered it. Last evening he said, "Hey, isn't it an anniversary tomorrow?" I stopped and thought but came up blank. He grinned and said, "You moved down here four years ago tomorrow." I had to go and kiss him.

Yep, what a difference four years makes!

So many of you I didn't know way back then, or didn't know as well as I know now. Yeah, it's a real soap opera-worthy story and we've come such a long way since then.

Spring and the anniversary of moving! *happy sigh* I think I'll go out and pick some more grape hyacinth to dry for the wedding invitations.

...other stuff to say but this post needs to stand alone...

*squish*

Feb. 14th, 2007 05:02 pm
rowangolightly: (Coming Out)
Well, our doorbell just rang. I answered (in all my hair-curler glory!) and there was this cute young man apologetically holding a vase of flowers! He said, "We're sorry it's so late!" and I just beamed at him and said, "Oh, that's ok!" Sorry!?! Hell, fella, you've got flowers in your hand and they're for ME and they're from the bestest fiance in the whole world...you've got nothing to be sorry for!

*sigh* They're gorgeous...dusky-orangey-streaked roses with tiger lilies, pink carnations, those tiny adorable green mums, deep burgundy snapdragons and acanthus...yes, I'll post pictures, um, tomorrow?

I'm one very lucky lady. I've heard from my two other loves today and just text-messaged the other one. Today is bittersweet but it's amazing to be so well-loved by sweethearts and friends. The sadness I feel is mostly for those of us left behind who are now without his but this is good to have done, odd as that sounds. Now this weekend, we can go about the work he left for us, building his dream as he wanted us to do.

Friends, whether you're solitary right now or in a relationship, you're never alone and you're not without love. You wouldn't be on this list if I didn't love you.

I'm the luckiest woman I know to have friends and loved ones like all of you.

Blessed Be...

Awww...

Feb. 14th, 2007 07:54 am
rowangolightly: (Twoo Wuv)
Many smiles reading all the Valentines! Thanks to everybody.

And three anonymous...good heavens! One I'm quite, quite certain of....

*hee*

Surprised the Bruce this morning with a white, warm&snuggly, plush new bathrobe this morning which he pronounced, "Perfect!" I've only been looking to replace his poor worn-out, thread-bare one for about a year and a half...

Blissful happiness this morning, liberally mixed with sadness for the loss of a great man but remembmering that life does go on. We honor those we've lost by living the best way we possibly can; on purpose with great strides and loving everybody we can along the way.

Love you all!

*grin*

Dec. 7th, 2006 02:54 pm
rowangolightly: (Love finds a way)
Not everyone will get this but my horoscope for tomorrow was just too funny to not post. Think it might be better for the whole week rather than just tomorrow but...

Also couldn't hurt to post as a little reminder! )
rowangolightly: (Rowan close-up)
1) Having acute enough hearing to realize the trash truck is on the back of the block so I can get the can out to the curb in time is a good thing.

2) One of the cats did (his) job last night. There was a dead mole on he front mat this morning. Ew. Very dead. Thanks, Minko. They're really cute but SO descructive. Go get some more, fella, just don't necessarily bring them to me, ok?

3) I did Callanetics yesterday and am not as sore as usual when I re-start. Yay, me! So this morning I'm going walking and then will do Callanetics in the afternoon. Yes, I'm motivated; I intend to do both everyday for the next two weeks; I want all my energy back. Funny thing is that Bruce independently decided the same thing that I did; gonna work out everyday while he's gone. And we didn't say one word about it to each other. Yeah, that tickles me.

4) I loves me a Cold Frosty Morn with whisps of Foggy Dew meandering over the yard and street. I'm gonna go walking before it all dissipates. Yes, I know it's song titles and that I'm a dork...

5) My life is very, very good and I'm a most lucky woman. And my life keeps getting better and better...

6) Everybody get out and VOTE today; if you don't vote then you lose all bitching rights as far as I'm concerned!

7) Love you all!
rowangolightly: (Default)
...the shortest post ever.

Life is GOOD.

That is all for now!

*smooch*
rowangolightly: (Twoo Wuv)
We'll see if I can get this to work. These are the first of the hand-fasting images; many more to follow I'm sure since there were many cameras flashing throughout the whole ceremony.

I spend a good part of the morning sorting and cropping pictures. Poor dear Brother William was doing yeoman's work of taking pictures in the gathering twilight with hands that had been carving wooden flowers all day long; I'm amazed he got the number of wonderful images that he did. Looking through them made me all floaty again...

cutting for lots of pictures )
rowangolightly: (Angel Statue)
http://www.xeromag.com/fvpoly.html

Go. Read. I don't care if you're poly or monogamous or a hermit. This is a wonderful site, often updated, that I think *everyone* should read. There is good stuff there about relationships, oriented at Poly, but for anyone who is alive...seriously.

Even if you're not in the least curious about Polyamory, this has such great writing about how to be a healthy person in general. Because even if you're not in a romantic relationship, we are each in relationship with one another every day. Our interpersonal relationships with ourselves and with everyone around us can always be made better even if your only goal is to be happier yourself. You are in relationship with yourself; hate to break it to you. Doesn't it make sense that if you are happier inside yourself and treating yourself fairly and thoughtfully, that you'll be an easier person to be around?

Yeah, I thought so, too.

Go. Read. Discuss...

I'm gonna be painting the bathroom.

Mornin'!

Jul. 28th, 2006 07:53 am
rowangolightly: ("God Save the Queen")
First, Friday Five )

Next, Friday and that damned trim )

Finally, Other stuff )

News Flash!

Jun. 4th, 2006 09:37 pm
rowangolightly: (Coming Out)
I'm still flying high from the glorious music this afternoon (see Bruce's post for more detail on the concert and the wedding) and tired from a whole lot of weeding, wherein I had to save the squash and the corn from weeds they were growing higher than they were. But with all the sewing there just hasn't been time for the garden! But I'll make up for lost time this week and get a workout while I'm at it. Oh yeah, about that news flash....
you'll have to look behind here... )

Squish....

Feb. 24th, 2006 04:04 pm
rowangolightly: (Coming Out)
Can I just say once more how much I love my honey?

Yeah, I can. *sigh* I'm a very happy girl...just in case anybody wondered.
rowangolightly: (Coming Out)
...for another weekend's adventure. East this time )
rowangolightly: (Default)
...about THE birthday present. I wore it this weekend and got to show it off and tell lots of people about it - now its time to journal it. (Apologies to anyone who has already heard me gush about this - but I simply *must* brag!) read on for the details, if you wish )

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