rowangolightly: (Default)
I am SO pissed off right now! This is the second time I have had a major contract taken away from me and the time has come to have it out.

There's a new king at KCRF for this fall. The last guy, another friend, did a wonderful job but he's decided not to come back. I think perhaps that he wasn't quite the right fit. Frankly, he hadn't drunk the kool-aid that the Entertainment Director passes out. This is a mature adult who does his job and does it well but won't bow down to the PTB. Having observed how this has worked for the last decade or so, I really do think this is how it works. His costume was made by another friend; a complete professional who met the deadlines and did a fabulous job. It was gorgeous. Note, this will become a factor in my story later; that the last king's costume was made by a non-kool-aid-drinking, non-cast costumer of the current administration.

The guy who is now King is a really nice guy, he'll do a great job. I've worked with I made his costume last year and he told me, straight out, that he really wanted to be King and was disappointed that he hadn't it through the last casting call. The mayor's costume that I made him was to have a great coat added later to have the costume be "King-worthy", as he put it.

So I pretty much expected this guy to ping me and say, "hey, we need to get started as I'm King now." It would make things sorta tight, schedule-wise, but I could deal with it. And frankly, the money would really come in handy, not to mention the notch in my belt of of making another monarch's costume. But I didn't hear from him at all, which made me start to wonder.

As I'm a fan of direct communication, I decided to ping him on FB, which is how we often communicate. I said, "Hey, congrats! Wanted to tell you how happy I am for you. Do you know what you're doing costume-wise yet? Just trying to organize my Spring schedule. If you want to discuss designs, I'd love to work with you and my schedule is fairly free for the next month or so, if you're wanting to get started right away. If you've made other plans, that's perfectly ok."

I heard back from him fairly quickly:
"Jim already had it setup with Annie for my costume this year. However, Riah might need you. She's hoping to know more after next weekend.
She's going to be Romani, but she's looking to have a leader-type costume made."

Fuming, I sent back:
"I will be happy to talk with Riah about her costume. Counting to 10 here. I obviously need to talk seriously with Jim. I have a problem with him assigning major costuming to someone who can't meet her deadlines and who is allowed to do so and who does sub-standard work. However, this is not *your* problem, sorry to take it out on you. It is mine and I will deal with it. But this makes me very unhappy that he has made a decision like this. This is the second time he has interfered with my income in a major way."

So perhaps I spoke out of line here, as I am wont to do from time to time. And it's all probably going to hit the fan because he and his whole family have drunk the Kool-aid. But I am REALLY PISSED OFF!

This is the same costumer to whom Jim gave about 8 court costumes to do last year, and whose sewing machine broke and who was SO late on deadlines that her clients had to wear old costumes for the HARD DEADLINE of the July 4th parade, when everyone else HAD to have their costumes done, or else risk being fired. This is the same costumer who puts out shoddy looking, costume-rental quality costumes; who works a FULL TIME regular job and does costuming on the side. But she's drunk the Kool-aid and is the costumer that Jim goes to first.

I am LIVID! I said the last time that Jim determined that "only Annie could do Royalty costumes" that I would go toe-to-toe with Jim over this. He has NO CALL to just assign costumes to one person, who is *not* staff, who is not a professional and who does not have the chops to handle doing good royal costumes. She probably doesn't charge enough but it's not as though she depends on costuming for her income. OH, heads are going to roll over this. One of them could me mine, but that this point, I'm not sure I even care.
rowangolightly: (Rowan!)
I need to keep at this to keep accountable. I don't know if this is seasonal, depression and mourning, new normal for me...or what.

But a dear friend asked me how I was this morning and this is what I said.
It's accurate and smack on, so I'll just post it here as my update.

"Lots of work to do, not enough time. Must do the work to get the money, not really feeling like it. Good things happening, but I feel numb-ish.

Wanna just take a day off and drink tea and read but I can't, not and get done.

Just REALLY really tired of pushing and pushing and not really getting any break. If I take a break, then I'm behind in my work. But if I don't take breaks, work doesn't go well."

The singing/music rehearsals and lessons are great and makes me feel alive and then I come home and go back into a haze. I really want to stop this merry-go-round and find another ride to get on; one that is fun and happy and where I interact on a personal level with a loved one and build a happy home and take care of someone and be taken care of.

Dating Chip is fun and I enjoy it but it's sure going nowhere fast. I can't push and I suspect that he's holding stuff back as I am; one simply can't be 100% transparent, simply not possible nor desirable. I'm just taking the time we have and enjoying it; about all I can do.

I had to turn some work back to a woman who has been bugging me about it. I should have been honest and said, "Look, I just don't want to do this project; it's not my type of thing." Actually, I DID say that but she pressured me and said she couldn't find anyone else to do it. It's a dumb jacket that she designed that she thinks she's going to get rich on but it's ugly and will have a very limited appeal plus she doesn't want to pay me much to make it up.

So I procrastinated, as I often do when there isn't a hard deadline. Yesterday she called me and got all whiny and demanding and dithered between still wanting me to make it and wanting me to send her back the fabric. I finally snapped and said, "Make up your mind!" Then she dithered as to whether I should mail it or meet her somewhere. So I'm mailing her stuff back and she'll supposedly reimburse me for the shipping but I doubt that'll ever happen. It's a fairly big box; about 15" x 15" from all the materials she kept mailing me. She honestly has forgotten how much she sent me and kept saying, "do you have enough stuff to make this" and sending me more. I think she'll be honestly astonished as to how much material is actually there.

I took this job reluctantly and now that I'm hammered with work, this is what happens. I accept my responsibility in this situation totally. I don't need this sort of crap but the exchange triggered my insecurities and my feelings of lack of worth. And now I have to spend money to ship her fabric back.

Bah.
rowangolightly: (Rowan!)
One of my biggest frustrations in life as an entrepreneur is people not replying to emails or phone calls.


I have two clients now, bless their hearts, whose projects are completely on hold BECAUSE THEY WON'T CALL OR EMAIL ME BACK.

For crying out loud, people, this is how I make my living. I can't work if you don't contact me.

One thing that really, truly sucks about being self-employed.
rowangolightly: (Default)
www.fiddlybags.com

brocade whistle cases
brocade and silk violin, viola and fiddle bags
bodhran cases
gig bags
instrument bags
brocade music book covers
musical instrument bags

yet to come:
hard-sided bodhran bags
brocade camera bags with drop-down front
brocade lap-top cases

Thanks to Eric's experiment, I'm #1 on google at the moment. This afternoon Adrienne's working on the web-site to make it look more like we want it to look. We have in mind a product options menu for the add-on features for each bag and maybe even a different shopping cart that is easier for her to make the site look like she has in mind.

Now I have to lower the boom on PayQuake (asshats have taken two months worth of fees out of my account after I CANCELLED them the same week I sent in their paperwork because CandyPress doesn't support them. Three emails and two phone calls haven't gotten a reply. NOT HAPPY. Dammit, guess I have to call the bank to stop them from drafting my account and set up my merchant credit card account with Authorize.net soon as I can afford to do so. They're more expensive but I bet I'll get what I'm paying for that way.

Movin' on!

Feb. 22nd, 2008 02:57 pm
rowangolightly: (Default)
Wow, the difference in how I feel between last night and today is AMAZING. All the hard work (yes, I was trying too hard with the photos...duh, forgot about viewing by thumbnails but still slow even so) and concentration was well worth it. Yes, it was very much outside my comfort zone but that's how learning takes place, right?

SO. The web-site is up and running. If you wanna see it, it's a FiddlyBags (dot) com. It's pretty simple at this point; needs a new logo and lots more stuff, oh, like a working merchant credit card account and all that stuff but nobody seems too awfully eager to do business on a Friday afternoon.

And I've made my first two sales, to friends offa LiveJournal, if you can imagine that! *LOL*
Who needs marketing when you have good 'ol LJ, right? The one job is done and just needs to be shipped, well, photographed first. And the other I'll work on tomorrow.

AND I'm doing a trade-out for the tweaking and the rest of it with a professional who needs my professional expertise; nothing like a barter that works well for both parties!

I'm feeling elated and like this is a GOOD thing; finally, finally getting this web-site up and going!

Yay! *bounce bounce*

EDIT: OH yeah, and if anyone wishes to leave a review of any of my products, I've turned that feature on. *hint, hint* Oh, I'm subtle, aren't I?

*sigh*

Jan. 14th, 2008 02:47 pm
rowangolightly: (pissed off bluebird)
Back to the drawing board. Some proto-types don't work. Spending 4 hours finishing the edges of a whistle-bag makes it unprofitable. Poo. ::throws design idea out the window and goes back to the drawing board::

And no, at this point, ideas and suggestions are not particularly welcome but thanks anyway. I already have more ideas than I know what to do with; it's making them simple, functional, do-able and of good quality that is the trick, marrying form, function and profitability is the puzzle.

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rowangolightly: (Default)
Susi Matthews

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