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Some thoughts...
Mar. 8th, 2006 11:59 amIt seems right now that many folk I know and care about deeply are going through changes. Life is, of course, all about change. Some of them seem good, some are joyful, some of them are painful and all of them lead to growth...one always hopes.
But change, no matter the cause nor the direction, is never easy. It's scary and risky and exciting and sometimes we don't think about how these changes may affect those around us. Sometimes we react to change by reaching out and sometimes by pulling in and fortifying our boundaries. If we're lucky we can fortify our own boundaries without scaring those we love away, without putting walls where we don't want them to be, out of fear. All of these changes require some of the same elements. These elements are self-security, trust, candor and kindness. All of them can be either forwarded or hampered by communication. Funny, these are the same elements crucial to any relationship.
Some of us are able to leap into change with both feet, risking everything, letting the chips fall where they may. Some of us do it fearfully, wondering if things will get better or worse. Some of us put it off so long that the changes happen in spite of us. For some of is, change brings out aspects of our personalities even we weren't expecting, both for good and not so much.
Many of these changes appear due to people seeking clarity in their lives. Clarity is a wondrous thing, whether sought out or found through serendipity, an 'ah-ha' moment. The search for clarity in and of itself often results in change. I would ask one thing of all of you seeking clarity and going through changes right now, whether interior or exterior. Try to remember that that your seeking affects those around you.
Fear usually has two responses; lashing out or running away. Both are contrary to open communication and to building bridges in relationships. Please, try to keep in mind the effect your changes will have on those around you. And try, if you can, to keep kindness in the forefront. We all have fears; keeping in mind that others have them as well may make communication during these changes a bit less jarring and a lot more gentle.
I'm a big Polly-Anna; I wish I could help everybody; make everyone talk things out amicably and just get along with one another. I'm a horrible meddler having finally found great happiness for myself, I want it for everyone else, too. Aw, hell...I was a meddler even before that, to be honest. But I really admire those who plow through their fears and their often self-imposed limitations and who continue to reach out to one another. Let's try kindness....ok? Please?
But change, no matter the cause nor the direction, is never easy. It's scary and risky and exciting and sometimes we don't think about how these changes may affect those around us. Sometimes we react to change by reaching out and sometimes by pulling in and fortifying our boundaries. If we're lucky we can fortify our own boundaries without scaring those we love away, without putting walls where we don't want them to be, out of fear. All of these changes require some of the same elements. These elements are self-security, trust, candor and kindness. All of them can be either forwarded or hampered by communication. Funny, these are the same elements crucial to any relationship.
Some of us are able to leap into change with both feet, risking everything, letting the chips fall where they may. Some of us do it fearfully, wondering if things will get better or worse. Some of us put it off so long that the changes happen in spite of us. For some of is, change brings out aspects of our personalities even we weren't expecting, both for good and not so much.
Many of these changes appear due to people seeking clarity in their lives. Clarity is a wondrous thing, whether sought out or found through serendipity, an 'ah-ha' moment. The search for clarity in and of itself often results in change. I would ask one thing of all of you seeking clarity and going through changes right now, whether interior or exterior. Try to remember that that your seeking affects those around you.
Fear usually has two responses; lashing out or running away. Both are contrary to open communication and to building bridges in relationships. Please, try to keep in mind the effect your changes will have on those around you. And try, if you can, to keep kindness in the forefront. We all have fears; keeping in mind that others have them as well may make communication during these changes a bit less jarring and a lot more gentle.
I'm a big Polly-Anna; I wish I could help everybody; make everyone talk things out amicably and just get along with one another. I'm a horrible meddler having finally found great happiness for myself, I want it for everyone else, too. Aw, hell...I was a meddler even before that, to be honest. But I really admire those who plow through their fears and their often self-imposed limitations and who continue to reach out to one another. Let's try kindness....ok? Please?
