Rowan's Journal

Hate the fact that anyone can post their comments, your comments and your locked posts to FB and Twitter? Hate the fact that you can't shut it off and that you have to trust all your 'friends' to not post your stuff all over the internet?

Go and do what I did, leave a comment here:
http://community.livejournal.com/lj_releases/

Only 87 comments so far. Oh, that'll change in a hurry.

Please read some common sense I found over at Ladyegreen's (and she had permission to pass it along so I am too)

http://ayoub.livejournal.com/1488850.html

Bottom line, be cautious of what others' report about someone else's business because they might not have that business' best interest at heart, know what I mean? I'm being VERY cautious, even somewhat suspicious these days, much more so than I used to be. I guess being burned pretty badly this year has made me more so. I'll still always choose to trust and to believe what I'm told but damn-me for an idiot if I don't check stuff out, right?

'Sides, cautious old broads live longer, ya know?

I have stuff on my mind this morning, regarding friendship and boundaries. I'm a pretty durned open person and I am blessed with a great number of friends. I'm most fortunate to gain new friends all the time, several this weekend, and that's lovely. But also, as a 'public figure' which any entertainer is, I have the need to parcel off certain parts of my life which really are not for general public view or things I want to share with some folk, but truly not absolutely everyone out there. This is what filters are for, but I've generally not wanted to use filters much in my daily posting. Well, that's about to come to an end; I'm cleaning up and clarifying my filters to make it easier for me to use.

Live Journal offers the opportunity to see very deeply into people's lives, sometimes more so than is really desirable. I woke up thinking this morning that, in being really honest with myself about this; I have categories of friendship as I think most everyone does. I have close "I'd risk my life" friends whom I trust to know nearly every detail about my life. Then I have dear friends who I genuinely like a whole lot and with whom I enjoy sharing time. Then I have friends that I enjoy running across whenever our paths cross and I have acquaintances with whom I'm very pleasant but frankly, whom I want to keep a bit at a distance for whatever reason. Note that this last category does not involve any dislike whatsoever, just not a level of closeness and intimacy that I happen to enjoy with the other categories. This is called "setting boundaries" and I'm about to do just that.

NOTE that this is not a popularity contest; this is not a time for "OH PLEASE, don't exclude me or I'll cry and be distraught." Anyone whining about it is liable to try my patience at this point. This IS me making decisions as to where and how I need to spend my time and attention. If I cut anyone from my flist, it is mostly because I just don't have time to read everything that is written, so that I can accomplish all the stuff I have to do, as well as trying to set better boundaries in who knows what about my life. Most who are cut from some filters simply won't know that they've been cut; I'm trying NOT to cause drama here! It is a truism that some of my most trusted friends don't even live anywhere close to me; some of whom I've actually never met or just recently finally met *wink*...trust isn't a matter of physical proximity but rather, emotional connection. Fortunately, some of my closest and most trusted friends do live close, fairly close anyway.

So, if I 'go away' a bit from some of you, please forgive me in advance; I'm just setting some more appropriate boundaries in my own life. This is necessary for both my emotional health and my quest for better time management.