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May. 25th, 2006 01:32 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rowangolightlySometimes wisdom is hard-earned; I don't by any means think I have a corner on that virtue so when I find things which really touch me, I like to share....
How to be Happy: (reposted with permission from dear![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
imbri6
Believe in your heart that you truly deserve to be happy.
Pay attention to your own actions. If you start to feel happy and "something always goes wrong", look to see if you're sabotaging yourself. Are you? Is it because you don't feel that you deserve to be happy?
If you're not happy, figure out what in your life is causing you to be miserable and find a way to change it, whatever it may be. Deserving happiness means that you also deserve to not be miserable. The break from the things that cause misery doesn't have to be a severe break, it can sometimes be gentle. Even if it's not, it still needs to be done. Often there are a LOT of paths to stop the misery, none of them are guaranteed to be painless or free. The vast majority, however, are worthwhile.
Take steps to become a person you can believe in. Stand tall and proud. Walk forward enjoying your life. Invite friends to join you on your journey and encourage them to stand tall and happy in their own lives.
You can't force someone to walk the path of life with you, it's their choice to walk with you or not. And do your best to resist temptation to encourage others to lean on you all the time. Everyone needs to lean occasionally but it should be a small part, not a major part, of any relationship. Encourage those you love to be strong, to seek happiness, and to believe in themselves.
Remember, too that everyone needs help from time to time. Ask when you need it, and be willing to help others. Just don't make it a habit to be constantly dependent.
Life is going to knock you down. Sometimes once, sometimes time and time and time again. Sometimes it's your fault. Sometimes it's not. Don't always leap to blame the world, examine your own choices and decide if you did it to yourself. Perhaps literally, perhaps more indirectly as a result of other choices you made. But also don't feel obligated to take 100% of the blame 100% of the time, because that's also not reality. Be fair with yourself, and honest.
Never forget that everyone, and I mean everyone, deserves to be happy.
It's never to late to change.
It's also not as scary as you think.
How to be Unhappy found on LJ but I forget where now...sorry about that.
Make little things bother you. Don't just let them, MAKE them.
Lose your perspective on things and keep it lost: don't put first things first.
Get yourself a good worry, one about which you cannot do anything.
Be a perfectionist, which means not that you work hard to do your best, but that you condemn yourself and others for not achieving perfection.
Be right. Be always right. Be the only one who is always right, and be rigid in your rightness.
Don't trust or believe people, or accept them at anything but their worst and weakest. Be suspicious. Insist that others always have hidden motives.
Always compare yourself unfavorably to others. This guarantees instant misery.
Take personally everything that happens to you.
Don't give yourself wholeheartedly to anyone or anything.
Get rid of your sense of humor. Life is very serious and you should take yourself seriously.
Two words: self-pity and lots of it. The whole world is definitely against you.
This was taken from drirene.com. Check it out sometime.
Happily, the first list reminds me of all sorts of people. Unhappily, the second list reminds ma in places of a few folk...but I ain't sayin'! It's sorta like that old joke about the Emperor and the Foo Bird.
How to be Happy: (reposted with permission from dear
imbri6Believe in your heart that you truly deserve to be happy.
Pay attention to your own actions. If you start to feel happy and "something always goes wrong", look to see if you're sabotaging yourself. Are you? Is it because you don't feel that you deserve to be happy?
If you're not happy, figure out what in your life is causing you to be miserable and find a way to change it, whatever it may be. Deserving happiness means that you also deserve to not be miserable. The break from the things that cause misery doesn't have to be a severe break, it can sometimes be gentle. Even if it's not, it still needs to be done. Often there are a LOT of paths to stop the misery, none of them are guaranteed to be painless or free. The vast majority, however, are worthwhile.
Take steps to become a person you can believe in. Stand tall and proud. Walk forward enjoying your life. Invite friends to join you on your journey and encourage them to stand tall and happy in their own lives.
You can't force someone to walk the path of life with you, it's their choice to walk with you or not. And do your best to resist temptation to encourage others to lean on you all the time. Everyone needs to lean occasionally but it should be a small part, not a major part, of any relationship. Encourage those you love to be strong, to seek happiness, and to believe in themselves.
Remember, too that everyone needs help from time to time. Ask when you need it, and be willing to help others. Just don't make it a habit to be constantly dependent.
Life is going to knock you down. Sometimes once, sometimes time and time and time again. Sometimes it's your fault. Sometimes it's not. Don't always leap to blame the world, examine your own choices and decide if you did it to yourself. Perhaps literally, perhaps more indirectly as a result of other choices you made. But also don't feel obligated to take 100% of the blame 100% of the time, because that's also not reality. Be fair with yourself, and honest.
Never forget that everyone, and I mean everyone, deserves to be happy.
It's never to late to change.
It's also not as scary as you think.
How to be Unhappy found on LJ but I forget where now...sorry about that.
Make little things bother you. Don't just let them, MAKE them.
Lose your perspective on things and keep it lost: don't put first things first.
Get yourself a good worry, one about which you cannot do anything.
Be a perfectionist, which means not that you work hard to do your best, but that you condemn yourself and others for not achieving perfection.
Be right. Be always right. Be the only one who is always right, and be rigid in your rightness.
Don't trust or believe people, or accept them at anything but their worst and weakest. Be suspicious. Insist that others always have hidden motives.
Always compare yourself unfavorably to others. This guarantees instant misery.
Take personally everything that happens to you.
Don't give yourself wholeheartedly to anyone or anything.
Get rid of your sense of humor. Life is very serious and you should take yourself seriously.
Two words: self-pity and lots of it. The whole world is definitely against you.
This was taken from drirene.com. Check it out sometime.
Happily, the first list reminds me of all sorts of people. Unhappily, the second list reminds ma in places of a few folk...but I ain't sayin'! It's sorta like that old joke about the Emperor and the Foo Bird.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2006-05-25 07:27 pm (UTC)You do better than most. ^_^
no subject
Date: 2006-05-25 07:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-25 09:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-25 09:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-25 11:05 pm (UTC)Or was that 'the world is going to end come Sunday'? Alright, perhaps it suggested buying an umbrella lest it rain and I get wet...
Christ on a bike, I've got to stop smoking hashish. I think it's done something to my brain.
no subject
Date: 2006-05-25 11:06 pm (UTC)And yes, if you see Christ on a bike, it is definitely time to stop smoking the hashish, I'd say!
no subject
Date: 2006-05-25 11:28 pm (UTC)You hear it too?! There is a conspiracy afoot.
(Sure, possibly, but I refuse to wear the aluminium hat. I've got my pride.)
no subject
Date: 2006-05-26 12:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-26 03:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-26 03:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-26 03:48 am (UTC)Sure, why not?
no subject
Date: 2006-05-26 12:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-30 03:31 pm (UTC)Although...hrm...only I've just remembered something. My dad has got hats fashioned out of old bevvie tins (or at least he had them). I know I've tried them on at least once.
So that isn't a claim I can make (or a dare I can walk away from) - 'cos I've already done it.
I wonder what became of them...
no subject
Date: 2006-05-30 03:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-25 11:20 pm (UTC)You deserve [insert desireable concept here] has always got up my nose a bit - because what if You don't deserve it? What if You have been very naughty, and rather deserve [insert undesireable concept here]. And again, it comes back to 'who decides'.
I may have the dismembered bodies of five orphans feeding the flowers in my garden - and I may have taken great pleasure in grinding them to tiny bits. So. Do I deserve happiness? Sadness? Another five orphans 'cos I've spent my monthly allotment?
no subject
Date: 2006-05-26 12:22 am (UTC)Personally I live by the motto, "An' it harm none, do as ye will" but the catch there is the 'none' part. So far as I'm concerned that means people, animals, the planet, self...none, literally.
And I most certainly do not believe that in order for me or you or Aunt Tilly to have happiness or prosperity or good health or tea and biscuits means that someone else has to do without. I don't believe that there is a limit nor a quote on positive energy, only those limits that we impost upon ourselves.
Who decides? Each of us, ourownselves, every single moment of our lives.
no subject
Date: 2006-05-26 03:46 am (UTC)It's interesting. I'm still working out where I stand on the concept of deserving. Part of me believes that people deserve what they get. Fullstop. Whether you be nearer to the cradle or the grave, what Life metes out to you, you earn. Yet another part of me wonders how that fits into a human's natural purpose - i.e., to be born, eat, make more humans, and die. A third part thinks 'ooh, daisies'. A fourth considers Africa and the ethnocentric concepts that seem to hover about deserving.
As to your last paragraph, I should like to believe that it isn't necessary for one group of people to do without in order for another group's basic (which of course is highly subjective) needs to be met. I've yet to see it happen. Here's to hoping it does happen before I shrug off the mortal coil.